Shoes for Short Legs

Now that we've addressed race, religion, class and body shaming, can we please turn our attention to HEIGHT?

I'm 5'2" if I stretch.  In my prime I claimed to be 5'3"; which might be true, but most likely I sucked in my gut and pulled my shoulders back.  "Proper posture," Mom's words ring in my tinnitus ears.

The Pritchards, of British descent, are a family of Short People.  I don't mean those of Peter Dinklage's stature (I'm afraid to use the wrong PC term, sorry) but those of us, I'd say, closer to the ground than 5'5.  5'6" always sounded tall to me.

In former days, I told dates they'd feel like Gulliver when meeting my family, since Mom was 5'-even and Sis, 4'11".  Dad (who had passed), was 5'10-11", and undoubtedly hoped my 9 lb 6 oz birth was a portense of my future height.  Poor Dad, his second question was, "Let me see her feet."  Another Pritchard trait: wide flippers which prevent us from falling over, like Weebles.

"Is he good looking or is he short?"

Mom always claimed if she were 5'7" she could conquer the world, so in her eyes the taller my suitor, the better.  I'm sure she was thinking of grandchildren.  In later years she merely asked, "Is he handy?"  One day my late husband, Tino, who was tall and handy, dropped something onto the kitchen floor.  On his way up he remarked,

"I had no idea you had all this stuff' on the walls,"  between the counter and cabinet.

I always feel most wall decorations are higher up than they should be. Mom grouped paintings on the walls, so no matter how tall the viewer, something was at eye level.

Sure, we're cute when we're young, like puppies.  But as we grow older and wider but not necessarily taller, our temperaments change as we experience life in ways which TALL people cannot fathom.

The obvious example: in the supermarket, when you need an item towards the back of the top shelf.  If you can't find a store employee you search for the nearest tall person. If that fails, you start climbing.

"If ever you need something on the bottom shelf, feel free to ask,"  I express, with a grateful, Thanks.  I'm sure I'm not alone; just ask.

Homes of every description are geared for tall people.  Countertops are higher than (my) waist and deeper; and upper cabinets, fuggetaboutit.  I need a stepladder to reach items on my own top shelf, and removing a bowl of soup from the microwave is always hazardous.  It's even a stretch for the ice cube tray.

Dad was extremely handy, so Mom had him lower the kitchen cabinets in their new Levitt home, I don't have a picture, but imagine.  Not all of us are as fortunate.  And furniture?  Rare is the chair in which my feet touch the floor.

Most clothing definitely looks better on tall women, don't say it's not true.  How many SHORT runway models do you see?  And you never hear, "Oh, this makes me look tall and thin," unless spoken by a very, very tall woman who doesn't want to be a basketball player.  I'm sure many of those women wished, at some point, that they were shorter; they don't realize how fortunate they are.  Oh, if only we could trade inches!

When I shop for pants in Goodwill I'm not looking at the style, I'm staring at the hems.  I don't feel like taking up slacks or sleeves anymore.  I know there's Petite, but often the measurements aren't right for those of us in-between.  I have found that short women don't donate their clothes as much as tall women, probably because once we find something that fits right, we wear it until it's threadbare.

There have been times in my life when I felt I wasn't taken as seriously as taller co-workers, but that may only have been because I'm a woman.  Some short people, myself included, develop characteristics of the Napoleonic complex:

 A domineering or aggressive attitude perceived as a form of overcompensation for being physically small or short.

Anyway, back to the title.  Mom loved telling the story of window-shopping as a young woman, when she was stopped dead in her tracks by a shoe store's sign,

"Shoes for Short Legs"

She ran inside.

"Yes ma'am, which leg is short?"

"Both of them!"

I hate having to run to keep up with a tall person's stride, it's hard on the heart.  I don't advocate banning Randy Newman's hit, Short People; but let's please tackle the HEIGHT issue.  To start, how about offering striped clothing with both horizontal and vertical options; commercials featuring tall women with short men (hetereosexual couples to cancel the stereotype, please); and require little folding steps on trucks, SUV's and busses, like they do for RV's.  I'm going on a trip to Puerto Rico soon, and worry already about placing my carryon in the overhead compartment.

Too bad I'll just keep shrinking from here on out.