Ear Pollution

 

I hate cell phones.  Sure, they're convenient, but what's so great about convenience?  I'll never date a man connected to the Internet 24/7, so the chances of finding my next forever-partner are slim to none, I've been told more than once.  So be it.

I find other people's very-public phone conversations an impolite (and selfish) intrusion on my sense of peace, not to mention my ears. Why should you care?

Because I'm going to start carrying my Kazoo in my purse, always within reach, so if my quiet space is interrupted by someone who can't wait until they're alone or outside to discuss last night's dinner, their neighbor's constitution or the latest family fight, I'll have my own noise-abater to practice Hail to the Chief.

Who can object?  What's a good argument?  If you've never heard a Kazoo, you're in for a treat!