Horror Paintings

Towards the end of boat-life in Puerto Rico, I began painting gourds 4" and smaller (I enjoy detail work).  Here're my St Patrick's couple aren't they sweet?  For decades I've attempted to create 'realistic' faces -- repainting eyes and noses 4 or 5 times is not uncommon and always frustrating.  Why do I do this to myself?

I'm sure there are some initials associated with whatever's going on inside my head, but all I know is that I am persistent.  I'll work on something over and over, and over again, until I cry enough already!  I'm still not entirely pleased with the end result, but happier than my first attempt.  I'm sure that's true for many, if not all, artists.

Here are some examples:

No idea what I was thinking when I began designing this figure.  I was flat broke, hoping for a miracle to whisk me from my desperate circumstances; when I fell on The Buddha, a two-part documentary narrated by Richard Gere; shown on PBS but you can find it on YouTube.

(A self-taught artist, my proportions are always wrong; and because of my lazy-eye, everything I see is 2 degrees 'off' so I'm never centered.  That's true with my photography, too.  It all looks straight to me, but if everything seems a bit cockeyed, that's why.)

By the time I finished she looked like this (yes, it's supposed to be a 'she' - the young girl who offered Siddharta a bowl of rice when he was starving.

Here's the start of Pastor Chad, memorialized on a wall in Hope Village, the tiny-house community for the chronically homeless which he founded and ran...until being eventually tossed out by his own Board of Directors following an unfounded accusation from an LGBTQ person who felt slighted.  This was right after I moved from Eagle Point in 2022.

In a nutshell, Pastor Chad was accused of not being sympathetic to the Trans-community.  From what I witnessed over the course of 4 years, the worst I could imagine him advising would be, "Be certain before you do anything irreversible."  OMG!  He was eventually exonerated but the damage was done.  Funding dried up and grants were cancelled.

Pastor Chad has re-invented his philanthropic efforts and now focuses on helping a particularly poignant segment of the homeless population:  the elderly.

I'm happy for him but angry that had to happen to such a kind-hearted man.  Perhaps down the road it'll become apparent that he HAD to go through that in order for him to help those he's helping now.

Please don't slam my opinions.  I'm tired of being told that everything I've known is now insensitive, unacceptable or just plain wrong.

I went into the Post Office and saw someone new behind the counter.  Our old Post Master recently retired so I wanted to offer a Welcome; but I blurted out, "So, you're the new guy," before I could see that whatever it was, it had shorn hair, plucked eyebrows, pierced earrings and nondescript clothing.  I desperately looked for clues as to whether this individual was born male or female while fumbling for an apology.

"I'm sorry - I hate being called a 'guy,' too."  The more I spoke the worse I made things, but to (their) credit there was no chastisement.  I suppose everything should be said using 'Person,' but...

Goddammit!  I'm sick of not being sure - it was bad enough when I couldn't tell the difference between babies, but now with adults?  I used to look for an Adam's Apple-clue, but that can be either removed or covered.  Still, I'll try my best.

[This was to be a gift for Elizabeth Pitcairn, owner of the famed Red Violin.  She may not have been flattered by my final result (below), but it was surely better than this version.] 

A glutton for punishment, I continue to struggle with my paintings to this day.  No need to provide examples...they're pretty similar to what you see here.  At least I can honestly say not true to people who claim they have no artistic abilities for whatever reason.

If you really want to do something you can learn; all you need is Practice, Practice, Practice!

Lest you think these are the best things I've done, here's a link to my website with photos:  www.andreajansendesigns.com

So I'll keep persisting - in my artwork and in life.  Happy St. Patrick's Day!