When Did I Start Failing the 'Pencil Test'?

I just tried it with an eyebrow pencil I don't use.  Wait - suck in the stomach, that oughta  help.  Nope.  Other one, too?  DAMN!  Mentally I feel around 38, but physically - everything's dropping faster than my SNAP benefits. If I live long enough there'll be nothing left but a puddle on the ground.

This is my 'Month of Mourning;' I included that phrase in this year's calendar design.  The 7th would have been my 31st wedding anniversary with #3, Tino; I like to believe we'd have lasted this long.  Tomorrow is the 3rd anniversary of BC's passing, sniff sniff.  Ex-Man #1 passed away on the 13th; Ex-Man #2 on the 27th; my dear friend Mary would have been 70 on the 21st, if she hadn't passed 26 years ago; and the 22nd's The Captain's birthday, he's still vertical.

I don't view all those occasions on the same level of grief, of course; and there are too many other sad anniversaries throughout the year.  But I told myself that if I indulge in the sniffles over things long gone, I'll relegate it to July.

From this year onward, I'll include the sad occasion when Trump's Big Beautiful Bill was signed, wasn't that on the 4th; which will financially screw me but won't go into effect until after the 2026 elections so I won't know how bad for quite some time.  They he'll REALLY let (us) have it.

I've been asked more than once,"Will the bill affect (my) SNAP or Medicaid?"  Of course it will.  But if elected officials won't do anything about it and 78 million voted for the Originator, what sense in me getting upset?  I'm not in the mood to fight City Hall.  Besides, I've learned that things generally work out better than I plan, and I'm done worrying.

I recently read something they've been warning for years:  decreased Social Security benefits.  This time it's, "In 10 years, SS will only provide 80% of your benefits."  So regardless of any formulas or theories about how I'm looking at this the wrong way, I've decided to start NOW to live on 80% of my current SS; or more precisely $950.00 a month.  That doesn't include SNAP, which is currently $185 a month but I won't count on that for much longer.  And as for Medicaid?  Who knows, after the Feds stop helping and tell the States to take care of their own.  I'm just glad I'm not terribly unhealthy; and since I'm over 64 I won't have to work 80 hrs per month.  If I'm wrong (and don't touch a cent) I'll amass over $28,000.  Which won't be worth that amount, but it's better than nothing. 

Don't you love how they're constantly deflecting from serious issues, such as solving Ukraine and Gaza, by investigating Comey and grilling Biden's doctor?  Nobody seriously believed Trump's promise to end both wars his first day; but after 6 months what progress do you see?

Trade deals promised?  That's just Donnie's wet dream of achieving the Ultimate Dealmaker title. To hell with the consequences of his flip-flopping tarriff rates: businesses failing and prices rising...he's too busy opening his Etsy store in the White House.

What about the brouhaha over revealing, once and for all, the Kennedy Assasination File and the Epstein List?  As I recall there wasn't any Ah-ha moment about Kennedy; and after Pam Bondi told us in February that she was reviewing the actual 'Epstein list', the Justice Dept now says it doesn't exist?  (I think I got that wrong - they're just not telling.)  No sense being bothered over that - MAGA supporters are peeved enough.

And don't you love them pushing this one: that our Secretary of Defense, former talk show host Pete Hegseth, decided last week to withold aid to Ukraine all by himself?  And this week Trump reversed the decision, which he claims he knew nothing about?  How can people close their eyes to all the lying they're doing to us all?

I don't want an electric car, Trump said the other day.  He apparently forgot he bought a bright red Tesla not long ago in front of the nation, after Elon brought his showroom to the White House.  And they talk about Biden.  Don't believe a word he says, but follow every order without question.  I believe the correct term is Boob. 

Instead, Fox News and Republican Congressmen focus on anything BUT.  Chasing after political and personal foes of our vindictive President. Ignore the money being made hand-over-fist by the First Family and their billionnaire buddies pushing Bitcoins - I'm still not sure what that is and I know I'm not alone; but you know it's going to come back to bite us in the como-se-llama.  Just a few years ago Trump declared Bitcoins were a scam.  Wonder what happened within the past 3 years?

I'm guessing most of Trump's supporters are not paying attention to anything other the carrot he's been dangling about lowering prices and making America great again through new manufacturing plants, I'll believe it when I see one.  But tell me, who's going to want those manufacturing jobs?  No one interested in real work.

So if (you) don't care about what happens to people like me, why should I care about what happens to you, either through natural disasters or the disaster on Pennsylvania Ave?  Have we devolved to this extent?  It's disgusting.

P.S.  I've already donated to flood victims; how 'bout you?

Bad Ideas Often Lead to Good Times

(Final leg of a recent cross-country trip.)  I was out of Iowa in no time and into Nebraska, April 17th.  This was, indeed, the same route I'd taken with BC back in 2016; and where we were caught in a hellatious hail storm which cracked my front windshield.

When I travel I don't bother with GPS, Google Maps or anything else which might alert me of possible danger, except the FM radio.   So when I heard on the radio, "Strong thunderstorms with hail possibly the size of golf balls," I pressed the pedal to the metal to get the hell through the state. This map is fuzzy, but I was right in the middle of the orange area.  

So I raced across Nebraska to North Platt, where I chose an $80 motel not far from the Interstate.  It looked nicer than the others from the outside, but I was jaded.

Lo and behold, I was pleasantly surprised the room was clean and had sheets.  I mentioned the approaching storm to the woman at the desk but she'd heard nothing; so I figured I'd gone far enough to prevent the possibility of my rental being pummeled by ice.

The Only King I Want Has a BURGER In It

Saturday's No Kings demonstration was my first, and I wasn't alone with that distinction.  Of course, we may have simply forgotten attending Vietnam protests during our youth; but if that's the case, at least we didn't lose our activism.

This protest was scheduled to meet at our town's Cultural Center, where we were politely asked not to hold up our signs on their property, but the sidewalk was fine.  They kindly allowed a small area for the Irish musicians; speakers; tables with Make-Your-Own-Sign materials; information about local events; and snacks and bottled water. 

Rosemary and I arrived quite early, so we wandered the art exhibits in the Center to kill time.   Co-worker Nellie met us there, and we procured standing spots next to the curb.  At first I thought we would be a couple dozen Seniors (and therefore dismissed as a force not to be rekoned with), but that soon changed.

By noon, the official starting time, the sidewalk was three layers deep; so organizers shepherded the 'overflow' down the sidewalk and safely across Hwy 101 to stand on the other side.  There were participants of all ages but it seemed most were over 50, I'd guess.  I saw one Palestinian and one Ukranian flag(s) which were largly ignored; not because those conflicts aren't worth consideration, but that wasn't the day's focus.

So we waved our signs with arthritic hands as people drove by, returning our enthusiasm with honking horns and lots of thumbs-up. Most of those who disagreed were at least civil and looked straight ahead while driving past; but there were others who made a point to roll down their windows, middle fingers raised, shouting profanities and telling us to Go Home - we weren't real Americans.  A few felt the need to speed close to the curb to give us a scare, which didn't work.  I just hoped no one would shove me into the street.

Cohorts in crime

A woman standing next to me was holding a good-size flagpole with a large American flag, which I feared draped dangerously into traffic.

"Excuse me, Ma'am, but your flag might become a target for some idiot to rip out of your hands as they drive by."

"I don't care, let them try.  I'm 80 years old and ready to go to jail. Not much frightens me anymore."  Gotta love her attitude.

We were advised that if there was any disruption by agitators we were to simply sit down.  And maybe sing, even if it's only "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall," do kids know that song?

I managed to snap a photo of the overwhelmingly favorite protestors (l); along with the best sign, we all agreed.  The ladies in red were adorable, walking single-file up one side of the street and down the other, the tiniest slowly bringing up the rear.

Oh, my, we were a rowdy bunch, with our wheelchairs and oxygen tanks...a truly threatening mob.  In all seriousness, it was a very peaceful demonstration.  We didn't shout horrible things about the President (they were left on the signs), and the one you see here may have been the most insulting.

I've heard much worse come out of our President's mouth.  As I said in the beginning, many of us were protesting for the first time, but we all felt strongly that we had to do SOMETHING.  What's going on in Washington is not right.  We value the rule of law, unlike #47.  We don't want storm troopers in our streets.  We believe in the Constitution, and don't want a self-proclaimed 'King,' who cherry-picks military personnel to stand in the background of one of his inflamatory speeches, shouting and booing our former President.  

That's not what the military is supposed to be about.  While I didn't actually SERVE in uniform I SERVED as an Army-wife for 14 years and through osmosis learned what behavior is permissible and what is not.  That's more time than Trump ever saw:  5 deferments during the Vietnam era, the last using 'bone spurs' as an excuse.

As a Civil Servant I was protected from indescriminate terminations by a new President.  I was only trying to help put food on our table.

But don't take my word.  If you are or were in uniform, you know for yourself; and shame on you if you're denying it.

Prior to the demonstration Rosemary asked about signs, but I was still focusing on what to wear.  It was only the morning-of that the words to MY sign popped into my head, and I quickly put it together in an hour.  I thought it was pretty tame.  There were about 500 of us, the news reported, and for a small town like Lincoln City, that's quite a showing.  

So for those networks who are discounting the thousands of small towns with thousands of participants, DON'T.  Sure, particularly in large cities, there are going to be people hell-bent on violence, but that wasn't the predominant response.  Take my word on THIS one, thanks.

What Do You Wear to a Demonstration?

So I'm attending the local No Kings demonstration this Saturday and I don't have a thing to wear.  What DO you wear?  Comfy slacks or rugged jeans?  Jammies underneath?  I'd give my firstborn son if I could still manage that.  Tennnies for running or cowboy boots for kicking (anyone in the way if I'm fleeing for my life)?  Not that I can run anymore, either.

I don't have any tops with slogans other than a pink hooded sweatshirt from Sis proclaiming Jersey Girl. Will my walking stick be considered a weapon? At least I've got a Donkey brooch I picked up in Goodwill.  Well, I've got a couple days to think about it.

I'll post some pictures here, since I don't live-stream anything outside of the loo.  Hee-Haw!

The Outcome: The Only King I Want Has a BURGER In It!

Musings on Dorian Gray

My mother held this view, to which I agree:  "You only see a person three times (physically); and after that what you see is who the person is on the INSIDE."  That's why a so-called 'ugly' person with a pleasing nature can appear more beautiful than a stunner who's ugly on the inside.

When I worked in the Netherlands in the 90's, my late husband, Tino, had an unpleasant task after someone in his department, a young man in his 30s, had a sudden, fatal heart attack on his day off.  Tino drove to the north of Holland to pick up Fred's parents to bring them back to Ridderkerk, near Rotterdam.

The drive took several hours each way.  Tino said that when he first saw Fred's parents he was somewhat surprised, for the husband was very handsome while the wife was quite plain and stooped over.  Many of us make that comparison, our bad.

Mom rode in the front with Tino, and after talking for hours, by the time they returned to Ridderkerk he said it was as if she had transformed in the car; for she was such a beautiful person on the inside, that's what he saw. Don't get me wrong - attractive on the outside doesn't hurt, but it's not what counts.  Isn't that what we're trying to teach young people who are comparing themselves to celebs with plastic surgeries?

What's on the inside of our President, who is now deploying the National Guard against his own people for various reasons but primarily because he hates Newsom; or focusing the wrath of his followers on a particular person or cause?  Someone who cares little about his spouce's feelings over his infidelities?  Trump left Ivana for Marla then Marla for Melania.  Who's next?  Who cares?  He's all for himself.

Are Republicans really happy with current events?  Leave out the immigration issue for the moment - when you cast your vote did you want all the rest?  Firing thousands without cause (where's the proof of waste and fraud?); targeting Apple and Barbie?  Throwing himself one hellacious (and expensive) birthday party in the guise of celebrating our Semiquincentennial while so many (lawful) citizens are suffering from hunger and lack of housing?

Guess he never heard of the French Revolution - he was only impressed with their parade down the Champs Élysées.  And may I just say: monstrous GOLD accessories may be fitting in Versailles, but they look downright tacky in the Oval Office.  Well, it is a reflection of our First Couple.  When're the thrones arriving?

Republicans (hopefully not all) believe most (if not all) Democrats are woke radicals who want to invite dangerous criminals into the country.  Are (they) truly that uninformed?  Ever bothered to look up the meaning of WOKE, or simply repeating mouthpieces, elected and un-, without question? Take a civics class, for Pete's sake, before AI re-writes our history forever, like Trump's trying by constantly declaring he won the 2020 election.

What's at issue, when it comes to supporting illegal aliens, is not molly-coddling criminals, but assuring that every person in the country, legally or illegally, are given the rights granted in our Constitution.   WHY?  Once illegal's rights are so easily trampled, what's to stop ours?

Tino Jansen, self portrait

Tino was one of those illegal aliens, and not entirely of his own making.  Our NYC based company, now bankrupt, regularly hired illegals for the manufacturing plant in New Jersey.  We knew when a ICE Customs  Immigration (whatever it was called) raid was imminent (they had their informants), for the plant would be all-but-empty of workers.  The company transferred Tino to the New York office, promising to get the proper paperwork once he was here.

I told him they were shifty and unreliable, but coming from a country which is kinder to its population, he refused to believe that. After all, he'd worked for them for years and they'd always lauded his performance; but once here, they decided the paperwork was too much trouble so they cut him loose without a how-dee-do.  Shouldn't the companies paying the illegals be punished, too?

So yes, I do know the fear of deportation, which people so lighly dismiss. We worried for over a year, until Tino passed from a sudden, fatal heart attack, like Fred.  Illegal immigrants are here from every nation on earth, just as there are plenty of Americans overseas who have overstayed their Visas.

What we DO advocate is equal treatment under the law, not just for white people. 

And for Christ's sake - the people who compare the Trump/Musk feud as casually as having an argument with their wife - are they kidding?  We didn't elect (them) or their wives - but we do expect our President to act somewhat Presidential, and I for one don't see that.

Trump's a vindictive man; a truly ugly person on the inside (anyone can be nice at times); and his jackboot followers in Congress are just as bad for blindly repeating the lines Trump demands, lest they suffer his wrath and be voted out of office.

It boils down to ego, and greed.  Trump never bothered to put his portrait away.

PS:  Beware sundown.  As happened in Portland, crazies from elsewhere, hell-bent on causing trouble, are driving as fast as they can, THAT's what the thousands of troops are for.  'Course, if they didn't show up to begin with, the crazies would still be at home.  Why didn't Trump act like this on Jan 6th?

Like Children On A Playground

After all that bull-horning that he'd easily (and quickly) stop the war in Ukraine, Trump, trying to save face by blaming everything on Biden, now says that Ukraine and Russia are like children fighting on a playground, and we should let them duke it out for a bit, like you do with kids.  Kudos to the German Chancellor, who not only managed to interrupt Trump while he was going nowhere on a rant; but stressed (without directly contradicting DJT) that Ukraine can't wait. any longer - it's been 3-1/2 years.  I love that foreign politicians, now that they've seen Trump's treatment of visiting dignitaries, are better prepared for his BS.

Well, I think that's the way we all should feel about Trump and Elon.  We knew their split was coming, and as promised, it's entertaining as hell to watch.  So who will win out: the proverbial liar in the White House or the former Best Buddy?  Money seems to win out these days, but Trump's got more crazed followers.

Like every other one of Trump promises, we'll just have to wait and see.